Being Silent and James Joyce.
WHERE AM I HOW DID I GET HERE THIS ISN’T MY SITE oh wait, yes it is. I just changed the name! How silly! It’s De Zwijger, now. In Moonspeak, it means “The Silent”. It works because there’s a famous Dutch guy, Willem I of Orange, who was also called Willem De Zwijger. Look him up on Wikipedia, he’s interesting. Anyway, it works here, because I’m rather quiet in real life, as opposed to my constant blabbering on fora. I’m actually really, really quiet. Even when I talk. So, people think it’s funny to call me Willem De Zwijger, even though it’s not all that witty. A bit like the Willem Rules thing. It’s not funny, guys!
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Poetry, pt. 6
And some more, I guess. I totally bollocked up the last post. Fixed now, I think.
Poetry, pt. 4
It just won’t end, man. Also, I’ve noticed my English poems are far more depressing than my Dutch poems. My Dutch poems are quite cheery, actually. Man, you non-Dutch-speakers really are missing out. Also ugly.
Poetry, pt. 2
More poems. I wrote them ‘n’ all that. Enjoy.
Poetry
Because I’m a fan of bad ideas. I love them.
Because I’m clearly a flaming homosexual (not really, ladies! *finger ca-click*), I’ve been writing poems. It was inspired partially by me reading all kinds of poems during my exams. (You have to do something, right?) Like Sappho, Petrarca, Edgar Allan Poe, etc. So, while listening to songs, reading poetry or being very, very tired, I wrote some myself. And boy, they’re not very good. Well, I like them, some of them at least. Some were just exercises in writing poetry and nothing more. Others, I think, worked. For me, at least. Anyway, enough with the “oh I wrote something but they’re horrible and I’m horrible wah wah wah I should be shot for writing it etc” uncertainty thing. Let’s just get this over with. A lot of them are in Dutch, but hopefully, I’ll be able to post one in Dutch and one in English in every post. I’m also doing this to feel less guilty about not updating my blog. Yes.
And don’t worry, I’ll go chop down a tree and wrestle a bear to confirm my manliness after all this.
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What I did during the exams
So, maybe you know this, maybe you don’t, but during the exams, I was computer-less for a few weeks. This was, of course, rubbish, so I decided to keep myself entertained. By decorating my dig (Man, I hate this word. Thanks, secundary school English class!) in Ghent, no less. Not wanting to decorate it like everyone does, y’know flags and posters and all that, I decided to draw something. Now, I’m not that good at drawing. And my first idea of drawing on the white walls, as several people pointed out, was fucking retarded. So, I improved my plan. I drew things on paper, cut the drawings out and stuck ‘em on my wall. The top of my “fireplace”, to be precise. (“Fireplace” because isn’t actually fit to house a nice fire. Y’know, burning down the building and all that.)
In which dead people are bastards
W: Oh, I don’t like this one.
H: Why don’t you like me?
W: You bloody well know why I don’t like you.
H: Is it the moustache?
W: Well, let’s see. Let’s look at the things you did wrong during your life.
1) Grow a silly moustache.
2) Start WW2
3) Exterminate the Jews
4) Being a total dick.
Gee, I wonder why I hate you!
H: I’m sorry.
W: You think that that’s going to make me forgive you?!
H: I’m really sorry?
W: Hitler!
H: Alright! Alright! I’m a horrible man! I couldn’t help it. I just hate jews so much!
W: We’ve noticed.
H: But at least I built the Autobahn, jah? That’s something I did right.
W: No, you didn’t. The Weimar Republic did that. Stop trying to take credit for things you didn’t do, you awful man!
H: I only have one testicle! Leave me alone!
W: What? No, seriously…What?
H: It was shot off.
W: …
H: In World War One.
W: …
H: The other soldiers called me “squealer” because I kept yelling.
W: I…I did not need to know that, Hitler.
H: You see, I am not that evil. I still feel pain and I had a troubling experience in WW1. That explains it.
W: No, it doesn’t! You’re still a dick, Hitler.
H: You make me very sad. I’m a sad Hitler.
W: I don’t care! You should’ve thought about that before you came up with the Endlösung.
H: Nobody understands me.
W: Shut up.
